The Con is by far one of my top 10 favourite albums ever. I think it is in my top 2 Tegan and Sara albums. Each song really speaks to me on so many levels and it had been one of the albums that has really helped me through any tough times I have had. The album was released way back 10 years ago in 2017, it is one I will never get tired of listening to over and over again. I am even planning on getting a selection of tattoos related to songs from the album over the next few years. So here is a break down of each song on the album, a few lyrics and the meanings to me.
I was married
'I look into the mirror, for evil that just does not exist' This lyric to me is about the battle with my inner demons i.e my sexuality and lifestyle etc. People may tell you what you are doing is wrong and not appropriate however you know deep down you can't see anything on the outside. The more I was told things like this the more I battled with myself and really started to focus on things trying to pick faults and see what others see.
Relief Next To Me
'I miss you now I guess like I should have missed you then' I listened to this when I ended things with Liam and I was really struggling with him being gone. Luckily we are now back together and he gave me another chance. However I really did spend hours listening to this song whilst we were apart, just trying to make sense of things I guess.
The Con
'Encircle me I need to be taken down' This was more of a stand out lyric to me due to the battle with my mental health. As things got bad I just wanted anything to help get me out of that mindset and out of my pain.
Knife Going In
'On the night I die, I swear I'll sleep outside your window' I don't know what it is about this song but I am hooked on it still to this day. The song is full of such raw emotion and Sara really captures the lyrics.
Are you ten years ago
'I lose track of where I am going and lose track of how to get going again' This song is another one of those songs that you can relate to when you get stuck in a rut. In fact it is one of those I always turn to.
Back in your head
'Remember when I was so strange and like able' A lyric I always go back to over and over again from one of my favourite songs. It just brings me back to the days before I tried to fit to what everyone else wanted.
Hop a plane
'Begging ocean please help me drown these memories' Another one of those songs you just want to listen to over and over again especially when you aren't in a good place. This is another song I listened to a lot whilst I missed Liam.
Soil Soil
'Oh I am feeling directionless yes' This song is only a short song however it is one of the best on the album. When I feel like I am confused on my direction in life I will listen to this song. It is a depressing one but so good.
Burn your life down
'It's not me or how I would be' One lyric I will always relate to especially on the days where I feel like I really aren't been myself and feeling like I am just going through the motions.
Nineteen
'And now where saying bye, bye, bye' Another one that reminds me of leaving Liam but really wanting to get him back. I am really starting to realise how much this really reminds me of him.
Floorplan
'I know I hold this loss in my heart forever' Relating once again to the lose of Liam but also to the loss of people throughout my life. I got Liam back although others I unfortunately never will.
Like O, Like H
'SOS to my mother, take the hinges of the door' I was a nightmare growing up and to be honest I still am. I used to get annoyed and slam the doors and throw some really bad tantrums. I wish I had played this song to my mum as a warning before I kicked off.
Dark come soon
'Saved from another day of misery' I love this song, it is one of the ones that when I play when I have had a bad day. It reminds me that once the sun sets and I fall asleep that a new day will soon begin that could be a million times better.
Call it off
'Call break my own heart' It is exactly what I did when I ended it with Liam and I will never forgive myself for that. It destroyed me however it helped me to grow too. I think in the long run it has made us stronger but at the time it occurred I couldn't get my head around what I had done.
So there you have it, that is how The Con has shaped my life over the time space of listening to it, I would highly recommend giving the album a listen if you haven't already. Do you have an album like this? Or have you ever listened to The Con, what do you think?
See you soon
Lucy
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